The streets...

Okay I have this friend who is surprisingly more carefree than I am, and that is something I have come to realize is hard to be. But my blithe nature make me look like this guys supervisor at work. I'm constantly shocked by his indifference to the most crucial matters of his life. I and lets call him Krimboy have been on many adventures together.
He was born in Lagos but moved to Abuja when he was still quite young, I was born in Kano the Moved to Abj like almost a decade ago. So you can imagine two very buttery boys (i don't know how to spell butty or butt E always has a butt in it..) walking on the streets of somewhere downtown Lagos feeling ADVENTUROUS!!! Our school had open gates (No exeats needed) for about two days, which was rear. So I and "cream-boy" decided to take advantage of this very rear opportunity and bail. We did not have any exact destination, we almost finalizing our plans involving going to UI to see one of his old flames in sec school then it happened.
These two random guys were in an excited argument then they beckoned to us. I looked at krimboy skeptically .... and from his look, he shared my sentiments... we went closer to them. One of them explained to us that hes friend did not know how to play table tennis then asked if we knew how. By now the rude-boys had started playing the game again (let me just say, picture your average danfo conductor, that is exactly how these men looked) and rude-boy1 was trying fruitlessly to explain the rules of the game to rude-boy2. Rude-boy1 then absentmindedly handed his bat to cream-boy beckoning him to play while he went round the table to explained in more detail to Rude-boy2 how to play table tennis. Lest me say this with all modesty, cream-boy handed Rude-boy2's ass to him on the table. Then Rude-boy2 nodded with the understanding of someone who just figured out how points are gained and lost in table tennis. At this point i was like "cream-boy lets go he gets it now" or something. My boy had already started to turn away when Rude-boy1 calls us back and asks us to continue playing, he then brings out a hundred naira note and states clearly in fast paced Yoruba (That I seemed to understand, but not as much as krimboy did) that if krimboy could beat Rude-boy2 in a match that we could have it. Well we couldn't say no to that! My boy got a hundred naira easy, then we wanted to quit. The Rude-boyz faces became noticeably more determined as we were about to go then Rude-boy1 begged us to play again this time bringing out 500 naira I think. So krimboy picked up the bat, started playing, and this time I watched Rude-boy2's face and deciphered that the look on his face was that of a pro determined to look like an amateur. We both new these rugged conductor could beat the living daylight out of us......just thought I'd let you know. I think krimboy noticed the look too because, immediately he lost to this Rude-boy2 (who "Learned How To Play Table Tennis" in his front), we payed them 500 bucks, he looked at me and we both ignored Rude-boy1's pleas to come back and try to win it back.
What was funniest about that day was the fact that without discussing in we both headed back to school and decided it was not the right time to go on fun trips. Now What we agreed on was to keep the event between us, it was just embarrassing!..but yeah wathever!..

Damn My Phone!!! please let it be a prank

I actually had alot to write about when I got back from work but all these yeye student don dey sharp. I doubt its a prank bcos actually working in a University I expected this to happen a long time ago(to someone else!), but you gotta have faith. Imagine coming into the bank and nabbing my phone and upon all the CCTV wey dey we no fit sight the thief.
This na some kind hustle sturvs... Anyway I have bought my tickets to Lagos to go for my guys convocation and was about to make some additional preparations. I went out to buy airtime got to the credit kiosk bought a lot for both my lines sat back in the car. I was already thinking of how i was going to ask Awana or our guy Sam to pick me from the airport (Awana was the safer bet!). I wanted to load the credit then i realized my phone was not with me. Then and there I started the prayer hoping that I left it in the bank, just had a bad feeling about this 1, drove back like a mad man, ransacked the whole place, harassed my co-worker hoping it was a prank, (I'm still hoping it is an all weekend prank to teach me to be more careful!) watched the playback of the CCTV for like 2hrs, then gave up. At a point after trying to call my phone a million time I actually wanted to send a PITY text begging whoever switched on my sim cards, by some miraculous inexplicable occurrence, to contact me or please send them to my office "I willing to reward".
But that wasn't going to happen, trust your average Naija bloke once E nab my phone like this...E go off am and my sims no go ever on for that phone again....two sims one phone that is just painful no contact backups. And have you ever tried to have a night out without a phone? it's like painting with your tongue, just plain wrong!. For this to happen this weekend it must mean that some higher power is instructing me to continue with my reclusive lifestyle and stop chasing the glamorous life like I did with the disaster club last weekend(Another story).
Anyway at least I've gotten rid of all those contacts I was too scared to delete, I can start Afresh. Damn all those numbers! P.S. Awana I hope you know this was a way of asking you to pick me up on the 19th at 11:30 am...lol

Why do good girls like bad guys???

2nd June 2009
We were out having a couple of drinks, when we got talking. We were mostly bashing on our bosses in the office and anticipating different events that were to take place after our service year. The topics varied wildly and we eventually got to the one topic that was a prerequisite for our gathering, girls. They say even in a holy city, when 2/3 men are gathered together they will speak of women. My colleague told me about his brothers rule .... girls are to be treated badly.... and went further to illustrate various examples for me. He told me 2 or 3 stories about girls who his brother treated horribly but were still drawn towards his presence like moths to light bulbs. He explained that even though he was "bad" in comparison to some other people (I made sure he included my name in the list of good people), he was still amicable in his behavior towards the ladies. He expressed his sincere yearning to become more like his elder brother stating that his kindheartedness was his present inhibition.
I told him my own story which was shared to me by a friend of mine, Ted. it was the story of a chick who was attracted to a guy because he smoked (i don't get it either) and after a couple of years/months of dating she wanted him to quit.(???)
He also told me of the story of the girl that hardened his heart by breaking it while it was still soft, and how it led to his present unemotional/casual strings of relationships...... i could relate. I explained to him why I too have been on a vendetta and have been unable to commit emotionally to any relationship since. I aspire to be like him and eventually like his brother. Anyways it sounded like a really solid theory...so i brought it here for scrutiny.....do most chicks just like the idea of "REPAIRING" a man ....or do chicks just feel alive when their relationships hurt a bit???

After drinking a couple of bottles of stout I got home and lay on my bed thinking to myself "I'm fcUked and hungry maybe I should fry bread and eat egg". After the meal I started writing and at the end of the post I realized I don't have anyone following my blog, so who is going to comment? Damn....

Lets call her Violet!

We are going to call her violet on account that the first syllable of her name is also a flower.
So today started out as every other Sunday, in the fact that I was postponing stuff I needed to do till Monday bcos I did not want to work at all, you know keeping the Sabbath day holy and all. Then I remembered how I was on a mission too make my life more interesting, so I called her remembering that she promised to call yesterday. She also promised to take me to her place and has been posting me for about a week or so. E be like sey she know once we I reach there it going to go down. Anyway i called at about 6 pm and she said she'll come over to my place at 8 I said "Ok see you then, bye". now I did not call at eight coz for some reason I had this idea she was going to cancel and I needed to.... uknow.... I was the only one at home today so I would be bored. So about 8:30 i called and she told me to meet at the small gate of her school I got there in 15 mins saw her and she gave me this cock and bull story of her friend being sick and her having to take food to her and all...I did not believe a thing she said ...maybe because I had been drinking. Anyway she had always been playing hard to get with me since I opened her second account for her. So I was not surprised when she escorted me halfway home, used the drizzling drops as an excuse to go and dodged all my intended kisses only a week after she voluntarily kissed me goodbye. She turned her back and walked away leaving me with a promise to answer my call whenever I beckoned the next day saying she needed to get going before the rain started and take care of her friend. I let her go ...
I got home settled down with another glass o f red wine. Now Violet is just the background story, basically this was the best part of my night... Now I've been tipsy before and I've watched the movie "just friends" before and if you haven't done anyone of those things you should try it (DRINK RESPONSIBLY AND DON'T DRIVE DRUNK PLS), But I have never done both at the same time. Now I would be selfish if i did not share this with you but SERIOUSLY I don't think I ever laughed as hard as I did tonight okay maybe I have but I can guarantee that I haven't laughed this hard in at least 2 years. After sharing this I just realized I have no one to actually SHARE this with so I'm going to holla at my home boy scribble...at least read your boy's blog once in a while, haba!
After watching the movie I tried calling another chick, which we will call Grey, I think she is really into me, (Dangerous, lets see what happens). She actually flashed me...and I tried calling her with both my lines and guess what Naija phone services Do it Again... ruined the rest of my night I just could not get through... I cant count how many uneventful nights they've caused me. Imagine two different carriers.. anyway enough lamentation the comedy was enough for tonight... lets see how tomorrow goes ehn?

E go be na? Your boy 9janeo

Lets call her Mira

Okay lemme just say this first "If I ever get the chance to, I'll scrap NYSC." Its one year of your life you'll never get back. I started serving sometime in August and I have been miserable since... I thought this was going to be my funnest year but it really was not. So I decided to kick up some dust and working in a bank is the best place to start, not to mention the branch in question is in a university "sweet sumtins!". I had actually stopped flirting after I left school because i found that students in a particular school usually flow on the same frequency. In other words I was out of touch with the real world for a long time and hence could not communicate on the same level as most of the other corp members I met Xcpt those 4rm my skool.
Back to kicking some dust, I am s'posed to be a marketer but on extremely Hot day I stay in the bank premises and deliver customer service . So she walks in with her friend and I remember my colleague at the office having serious rapport with her friend Sandy on one of our business trips to their faculty. I also remembering saying sumfin like our bank was the best in customer satisfaction, she said you don't even have Tv in the hall, I said if that's the problem any time your in the bank come and i'll give you my phone. I'm going to get DSTV mobile bcos of you (i said this jokingly of course dstv Ke!). She said sure no prob.
Immediately Mira came in she walked straight to my table with Sandy following closely smiled and said where is my phone. Now I have a problem i have not told you guys about, I love it when a chick has well pronounced incisors (chipmunk style). She had the cutest chipmunk dentition I had seen, which made me love her smile, of course. I gave her the phone, she sat down with it transferring stuff, while sandy withdrew some money then went over to my colleagues desk and chatted with him 4 some time. When her friend was through she came over and handed the phone to me. I told her goodbye... that was when it really started.
I saw sandy some time after, walked up to her and asked her for her friends number after exchanging pleasantries, she gave me. Now I started thinking that Mira must have felt a connection that's why her friend gave me her number so easily, I used to have to give a very good explanation and beg b4 collecting a chicks number 4rm her friend.....hmm! Well there was no need for me to try and make Sandy feel better by collecting her own number, matter of fact that will only make her realize that I was trying to make her feel better and she'll feel bad, get it?. So i thanked her and walked away.
It was all uphill from there, things moved fast, dust started settling, a new chapter was created, ....and this turned into one of my most interesting stories in this little town I am serving my country from.

The day my life started ......again

Like many people I was born on july 29th sometime in the nineties. I lived my life to what at the time I considered to be the fullest. I ignored certain indulgences thinking to myself "I dont need to know what that feels like, matter of fact I can live without that". I continued this way till sometime in 2004. I grew up in a unstable state, politically, religiously, generally. That day I woke up in a state of chaos that had been plunged into astate of pandemonium. There had been similar occurences but this one seemed to have me and everyone I knew in its centre. For the first time in a long time my family fled clinging to the solutions that provided the highest probability of preserving our lives. Anyway it was during this period refuge that I encounted an angel of indulgence......she taught me how to live fully.
On the 13th of July 2009 I woke up.....
It was like I had been Atlas, for about four years, and the heavens suddenly disapeared from my shoulders. The last date i remembered living fully was .........4th 0f 0ctober 2004. Now it seems those four years rushed by, but when i was living them they were as slow as a fish trying to run.
They over......i'm living again......i've been living for 6 months.....